My girlfriend and I were dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends encouraged me, and my girlfriend? She was a dream!
There was only one thing bothering me, quite much indeed, and that was my mother-in-law to be. She was a career woman, smart, but most of all beautiful and sexy, who sometimes flirted me, quite obviously too, and made me feel uncomfortable.
One day, she called me and asked me to come over, to check the invitations. So I went. She was alone, and when I arrived, she whispered to me, that soon I was to be married, and she had feelings and desires for me that she can't overcome. So before I get married and commit my life to her daughter, she wants to make love to me just once...
What could I say? I was in total shock, and couldn't say a word. So, she said, I'll go to the bedroom, and if you are up for it, just come and get me. I just watched her delicious behind as she went up the stairs. I stood there for a moment, and then turned around and went to the front door... I opened it, and stepped out of the house.
Her husband was standing outside, and with tears in his eyes, hugged me and said, we are very happy and pleased, you have passed our little test. We couldn't have asked for a better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family
Lesson learned: Always keep your condoms in your car.
Monday, April 30, 2007
A peep into the sex lives of people around the world
On a beautiful deserted island in the middle of nowhere, the following people are stranded
2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman
2 French men and 1 French woman
2 German men and 1 German woman
2 Greek men and 1 Greek woman
2 English men and 1 English woman
2 Polish men and 1 Polish woman
2 Japanese men and 1 Japanese woman
2 American men and 1 American woman
2 Australian men and 1 Australian woman
2 New Zealand men and 1 New Zealand woman
2 Irish men and 1 Irish woman
One month later, the following things have occurred:
* One Italian man killed the other Italian man for the Italian woman
* The two French men and the French woman are living happily together having loads of sex
* The two German men have a strict weekly schedule of when they alternate with the German woman
* The two Greek men are sleeping with each other and the Greek woman is cleaning and cooking for them
* The two English men are waiting for someone to introduce them to the English woman
* The Polish men took a long look at the endless ocean and took one look at the Polish woman and they started swimming
* The two American men are contemplating the virtues of suicide, while the American woman keeps bïtching about her body being her own, the true nature of feminism, how she can do everything that they can do, about the necessity of fulfillment, the equal division of household chores, how her last boyfriend respected her opinion and treated her much nicer and how her relationship with her mother is improving. But at least the taxes here are low and it is not raining
* The two Japanese men have faxed Tokyo and are waiting for instructions
* The two Australian men beat each other senseless fighting over the Australian woman, who is checking out all the other men, after calling the two Australian men 'bloody wankers'.
* Both New Zealand men are searching the island for sheep.
* The Irish began my dividing the island into North and South and set up a distillery. They do not remember if sex is in the picture because it gets sort of foggy after the first few litres of coconut whiskey, but they are satisfied in that at least the English are not getting any.
2 Italian men and 1 Italian woman
2 French men and 1 French woman
2 German men and 1 German woman
2 Greek men and 1 Greek woman
2 English men and 1 English woman
2 Polish men and 1 Polish woman
2 Japanese men and 1 Japanese woman
2 American men and 1 American woman
2 Australian men and 1 Australian woman
2 New Zealand men and 1 New Zealand woman
2 Irish men and 1 Irish woman
One month later, the following things have occurred:
* One Italian man killed the other Italian man for the Italian woman
* The two French men and the French woman are living happily together having loads of sex
* The two German men have a strict weekly schedule of when they alternate with the German woman
* The two Greek men are sleeping with each other and the Greek woman is cleaning and cooking for them
* The two English men are waiting for someone to introduce them to the English woman
* The Polish men took a long look at the endless ocean and took one look at the Polish woman and they started swimming
* The two American men are contemplating the virtues of suicide, while the American woman keeps bïtching about her body being her own, the true nature of feminism, how she can do everything that they can do, about the necessity of fulfillment, the equal division of household chores, how her last boyfriend respected her opinion and treated her much nicer and how her relationship with her mother is improving. But at least the taxes here are low and it is not raining
* The two Japanese men have faxed Tokyo and are waiting for instructions
* The two Australian men beat each other senseless fighting over the Australian woman, who is checking out all the other men, after calling the two Australian men 'bloody wankers'.
* Both New Zealand men are searching the island for sheep.
* The Irish began my dividing the island into North and South and set up a distillery. They do not remember if sex is in the picture because it gets sort of foggy after the first few litres of coconut whiskey, but they are satisfied in that at least the English are not getting any.
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