Saturday, May 12, 2007

The wild ways of making sex

* Sex in a boat -- oar-gasms.

* Sex with a nerd -- dork-gasms.

* Sex at the entrance to your house -- door-gasms.

* Sex on carpet or linoleum -- floor-gasms.

* Sex at the supermarket -- store-gasms.

* Sex at a Steven King Movie -- horror-gasms.

* Sex with a prostitute -- whore-gasms.

* Sex with an accountant -- bore-gasms.

* Sex while sleeping -- snore-gasms.

* Sex with 'Arthur' -- Dudley Moore-gasms.

* Sex with cartoon donkeys -- Eyeore-gasms.

* Sex while broke -- poor-gasms.

* Sex with a lion -- roar-gasms.

* Sex for hours and hours on end -- sore-gasms.

* Sex on a golf course -- fore-gasms.

* Sex with a nymphomaniac (or Ritzi) -- more-gasms.

* Sex in a gold mine -- ore-gasms.

* Sex with a dermatologist -- pore-gasms.

* Sex with a politician -- Al Gore-gasms.

* Sex with Chocolate, marshmallows, and graham crackers -- s'more-gasms.

* Sex with a bullfighter -- toreador-gasms.

* Sex with a masked man carrying a sword -- zorro-gasms.

* Sex on the beach -- shore-gasms.

* Sex at an all-you-can-eat buffet -- smorgasbord-gasms.

* Sex on a cruise ship deck -- shuffleboard-gasms.

* Sex in Asia -- Singapore-gasms.

* Sex among the wonders of nature -- outdoor-gasms.

* Sex in the vicinity of a garbage can -- odor-gasms.

* Sex on the way to the train -- 'All Aboard'-gasms.

* Sex that wasn't very satisfying -- 'There's the door'-gasms.

* Sex in an adult theater -- hard-core-gasms.

* Sex with someone who's not paying attention -- ignore-gasms.

* Sex with a competitive partner -- score-gasms.

* Sex while flying -- soar-gasms.

* Sex with a beloved partner -- adore-gasms.

* Sex with a meat-eater -- carnivore-gasms.

* Sex with a person who's got a really bad hairdo -- pompadore-gasms.

* Sex with someone who's got bad taste in clothes -- velour-gasms.

* Sex while travelling -- tour-gasms.

* Sex with a big dog - labrador-gasms.

* Sex with Beavis and Butthead -- 'GonnaScore'-gasms.

* Sex on stairs at the mall -- escalator-gasms.

* Sex with three of your friends -- four-gasms.

* Sex with a Norse God -- Thor-gasms.

* Sex when resistance is futile -- Borg-gasms.

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